I have realized I need to repent of the sin of gluttony and hoarding. People keep telling me a lot of stuff and I didn't believe them. I was convinced I would need no more than 5 boxes to pack up all my stuff.
I was living in fantasy land.
I have a dozen or so boxes, two suitcases, and a few plastic bags FULL of stuff.
My landlord's wife has been telling me for the last 3 years that I have too much stuff. I didn't believe her because I kept comparing myself to everyone else. In college, everyone would be taking 5 cartloads of things to their car and have dozens of boxes outside of their room. I would have 3 or 4 cartloads and 1/2 dozen boxes outside of my room.
Another case of comparison came last night. C was helping me pack and she commented on the amount of shoes I have "I get it from my mother, but she's WAY worse than I am."
C: "That's scary!"
Me: "Whenever I go back, I don't take extras with me because I know I'll come back with 2 or 3 pairs."
The last pair of shoes I actually bought were a $6 pair of tennis shoes from Target last year.*
When I moved to my current place from Chattanooga, I gave away about half of what I had. I downsized majorly.
After getting about 95% of my packing done as of last night, I have realized that - indeed - I have too much stuff for one person. It doesn't matter if compared to others I'm not "that bad", compared to perfection I am WAY off. Granted, I may never be able to attain perfection, but I should still strive for it nonetheless.
R. just offered her husband's services to me. Apparently he's "EXCELLENT" at dealing with pack rats and getting them to repent . . . after making them cry.
I haven't cried in several months, maybe that sort of catharsis will be good for me.
*Upon reflection, I realize that this is my problem. Most of my stuff is not stuff I buy. I'm not going into debt buying stuff. Just about everything I have is a gift. This is why I don't part with things because I would feel like I'm spitting on someone's thoughtfulness.
Parting with a dozen or so t-shirts a year ago was SO hard because I felt like I was throwing away sentiments. My mom buys me lots of things for birthdays and Christmas. I'm getting so old she is starting to repeat gifts. (She'll buy the same thing twice, forgetting that she bought it the year before.)
I have things, but they aren't hoarded for the sake of hoarding. They are hoarded because it's my way of showing that I appreciate the thought.
Perhaps I need to come with some other way to show my appreciation . . . . .
Leave a comment